Oak Harbor loses special coach in Ralph Mills

Despite their anguish, several of Oak Harbor’s girls basketball players felt they’d be most comfortable in the gym.

Rockets junior varsity girls coach Ralph Mills died of a heart attack early Thursday morning. The girls wanted to spend the day around basketball because that was the best way to feel close to Mills.

“He worked with everyone (in the program) and he loved to spend his time there,” Oak Harbor junior Maddy Rathbun said. “He told us he’d spend as much time there as we wanted.”

Rathbun, who can’t play in varsity games as she recovers from offseason knee surgery, developed a special perspective on Mills’ unconditional love for his girls from the bench.

“If you were excited, you could go to him and he’d be just as excited,” Rathbun said. “No matter what it is. There are countless examples. If somebody did a post move properly, we’d jump up and slap hands. You could just tell. He always saw the best in every player. He’s willing to work with anyone.”

Mills joined coach Tom Kontak’s staff his second year at Oak Harbor on recommendation from Mark Boukissen, who was an assistant at the time. Boukissen will finish this season as junior varsity girls coach.

“I met him in Fremont and in five minutes I knew he was the right guy,” Kontak said. “Ralph worked extensively with the posts. He was a great teacher. He was a post and had a passion.

“He was also looking for the countermove to outdo what people were doing against us. He enjoyed that. He had a smart basketball mind.”

Mills coached at Oak Harbor the last three years. He coached girls and boys at various levels in the Fremont area for 37 years, including St. Joseph Central Catholic.

“He loves all his players and being part of a group with the game he truly loved,” Kontak said. “He balanced the handling of players. He was always the one to put his arm around a player and take them for a little walk.

“He had a calming effect. He was one of the most kind and caring people I’ve been around. He was a great guy loved by all.”

Mills had Parkinson’s and trembled noticeably, although he never complained. Instead, he listened and shared and was quick to do favors.

Oak Harbor is unbeaten this season and has clinched the Sandusky Bay Conference crown outright. The Rockets’ varsity players spent the day together Thursday before meeting as a team. The team is close as a group – and Mills certainly has something to do with that.

Players throughout the program had all spent time at Mills’ home.

Oak Harbor’s girls will wear a band on their uniforms in memory of Mills. A spot for Mills will be maintained on the Rockets’ bench.

“We’re going to carry on his memory,” Kontak said. “We’re going to do what Ralph would want and honor him by carrying on playing the game and representing our school and team the right way. That’s what Ralph Mills would want.

“He’d want us to keep fighting and moving forward. We’ll be there for each other. We’re mourning and we’ll work through to celebrate the joy Coach Ralph brought us.”

The Rockets will keep Mills in their hearts.

“He always smiled and had something to smile about,” Rathbun said. “I don’t remember seeing him sad. The only time he cried was when he was immensely proud of us. He was impactful.

“He was sweet and soft, but he had an influence. Everybody is thankful Coach Ralph came to Oak Harbor and he blessed us with knowing him. All of us.”

mhorn@gannett.com

419-734-7519

Twitter:@MatthewHornNH