They walk in her shoes — literally
ZANESVILLE — Dorothy Thomas, chairperson for the Domestic Violence Coalition Mission, will admit it's a funny sight: grown men in high-heels struggling to clip-clop down the street without falling to the ground.
"It's clear that domestic abuse is a serious and widespread issue here and across the country," Thomas said. "But we also are aware that humor is a good way to open up the conversation, to make people look twice and educate themselves on the problem."
Zanesville's second annual Walk a Mile in My Shoes event was held Monday evening on Main Street outside the downtown courthouse, with various local celebrities and support groups coming out to don high heels to walk a mile and raise awareness for the problem of domestic abuse. The street was closed as the groups strutted down the asphalt to the cheers and laughter of a crowd of more than 150 people who showed up in support.
"Too many people think this is a problem for poor people, for people who are already marginalized, for people who can't afford to escape from the abuse," Thomas said. "What they don't realize is that this may be affecting your co-worker, your neighbor, your friend.
"It's crosses all boundaries," she added, "and that's why we need to come out and make it known that there is help out there."
Muskingum County Sheriff Matt Lutz, one of the 20 local celebrities who came out to the event, had some concerns before slipping on his heels.
"I stayed off my feet for awhile today because last year's event just ruined my calves," Lutz said. "It's a great event, though. Humor aside, this is a problem that affects so many people, and this is the least we can do to help those who have already gone through so much."
The event also featured a keynote speech from counselor Teresa Headley, who spoke of her own experience in an abusive relationship. Despite the work she did in her professional life to help women escape from such abuse, she herself felt trapped in her own marriage, suffering physical violence on an ongoing basis.
"I broke down, feeling like a failure for ending up in that spot myself," Headley said. "I was blindsided by the abuse."
But this feeling of weakness was finally alleviated by the support of Thomas, who helped her forge a new life.
"No matter how frustrated you may be with the situation a loved one or a friend has ended up in, you must be there for them," Thomas said. "You need empathy and you need to let them know that they are loved and supported."
This notion — that the important thing is to ask why the abuser is inflicting pain, rather than why the one receiving the pain does not leave — is paramount to changing the way society treats cases of abuse, Thomas said.
"No more blaming the victim, but rather we need to create support systems," she said. "We can't desert them. Without support, they may not get away from the abuse, and when they do get free, we need to be there still to help them build a new life."
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