LIFE

Parents: Think before you post to social media

Anna Jeffries
Gannett Ohio
  • Before sharing photos of their kids online%2C there are many things for parents to consider.
  • Parents need to think about how their children will view the photos they choose.

Spend just a few minutes on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram and it's clear that photos play a big part in documenting our everyday lives.

With smart phones, it's easy to take pictures of your pets, your vacations and even what you're eating for dinner, and share them almost instantly.

For many parents, it seems perfectly natural to share photos of one of their biggest priorities — their kids — on social media.

Some moms and dads take it one step further, creating a specific account just for their children.

A recent Gerber.com survey of millennial moms, age 18 to 34, found that 40 percent started social media accounts in their baby's names, before the child's first birthday.

Another seven percent said they started an account before the second birthday.

"There are interesting reasons why parents create (their child's) own account," said Rick Voithofer, an associate professor for educational technology at Ohio State University. "One is to maintain their own identity, separate from their child, and the other is so they don't inundate people with their 500 baby pictures."

But parents shouldn't take these social media accounts lightly. Whenever they post a photo of a young child online, there are many factors to consider, said Denise Lisi DeRosa, program manager for good digital parenting at the Family Online Safety Institute.

"You have to try and be mindful with what you are sharing and who you are sharing it with," she said.

Consider privacy settings

Before posting photos or creating a new account, it's important for parents to familiarize themselves with that social media site's privacy settings, Voithofer said.

"If you are using Facebook, those privacy settings and policies change pretty consistently," he said. "You have to understand the importance of keeping up with that."

Families should use the highest privacy settings and only share photos with family and close friends. It's a good policy to to avoid using your child's full name and other identifiable information, such as birthdays or addresses, DeRosa said.

A private photo sharing site that can be password protected is another way to share photos with a select group of people, DeRosa suggested.

"Not everyone in the universe needs to see every photo and milestone," she said. "It's best to keep that in a protected space."

When sharing photos, it's important to consider other parents' privacy concerns as well. If you child has a playdate with a friend, check in with the child's mom and dad before posting a photo to social media, she said.

"If you are going to be sharing photos, it's important to think about other peoples' feelings," she said.

'The Internet never forgets'

When parents get that first sonogram picture or capture an adorable (but embarrassing) moment on their smart phone, they might get the urge to share it immediately, Voithofer said.

But they should stop and think about how their kids might feel down the road.

"One of the things I think about is, the Internet never forgets," he said. "So whatever parents are posting becomes part of that child's digital identity. Anyone at any point can search for it and find it."

A photo of your child in the bathtub is cute when he is 6 months old, but your 13-year-old might find that picture humiliating, he said.

"If parents want to have their own identity, at some point their child is going to want to have their own identity and are they going to want what you are posting to be part of their identity?" he said. "Are they going to be happy with that at age 15?"

As their children get older, parents need to respect their kids' wishes and privacy. If they ask for a photo to be taken down, parents should listen to them and talk about it, DeRosa said.

"Once they hit the tween years, you have to allow your child to make some decisions about how they want to be presented online," she said. "You are telling them you want them to use technology appropriately and have a positive presence online. If you are giving them that responsibility, you also need to be respectful of them and ask them what they want to be put out there."

Set a good example

Most social media sites allow users to create an account when they turn 13. If parents think the child is mature enough, they should consider handing over the reigns of any social media accounts they created for the child, DeRosa said.

At that point, the child can decide if she wants to take down the account or use it herself.

"Once you allow them to do that, you need to have the conversation that what you share is permanent," she said. "Talk to them very openly in the beginning about what your values are."

Parents also need to understand their children are watching them on social media, just as much as the adults are watching the kids, Voithofer said.

"I think kids learn probably more by what you do then what you say. Students will observe how their parents use social media," he said.

Setting a good example starts early, DeRosa said.

"If you want your child to be mindful and respectful, you need to be mindful of that as well, especially when they are babies," she said.

ajeffries@newarkadvocate.com

740-328-8544

Twitter: @amsjeffries

Protecting teens online

Once children and teenagers establish a social media presence online, parents have to make sure their privacy is protected, especially from strangers. Here are some topics to discuss, before they set up their profile.

• Parents should stress to their children that they shouldn't "friend" anyone they don't know. Kids and teens should also understand that people can misrepresent themselves online.

• Teens should understand they should never give away their personal information online, or agree to meet anyone they've met online in person.

The Family Online Safety Institute offers a variety of tools for parents, including the following links:

• https://www.fosi.org/good-digital-parenting/helping-parents-protect-teen-privacy-online-/

• https://www.fosi.org/good-digital-parenting/3-unique-ways-parents-can-assure-digital-safety/

• https://www.fosi.org/good-digital-parenting/building-digital-dialogue-relationship-kids/

Source: Family Online Safety Institute