Postpartum depression support group gives women a voice

• Two postpartum depression survivors have organized a support group for women.
• Mothers Offering Mothers Support will focus on women with postpartum depression%2C anxiety and other illnesses.
• The group meets on the last Wednesday of every month from 6 to 8 p.m. at the main branch of the library.

NEWARK – It took Caitlin Estep a long time to talk about her postpartum depression.

For months, she was overcome with crippling anxiety whenever she was left alone with her infant son. She would hear him cry, but could barely summon the strength to take care of him.

At night, her mind would race and she'd have terrible thoughts. She began to think her husband and son would be better off if she weren't around at all.

She knew there was something incredibly wrong, but she was too scared to tell anyone how she was feeling.

"I was afraid of the judgment factor," Estep said. "I didn't want to lose my husband or my son."

It's been two years since Estep began experiencing signs of postpartum illness. And she's done being silent about it.

The Newark woman is working with Christina Boeshart, another local mom who has experienced postpartum depression, to create Mothers Offering Mothers Support, affectionately known as MOMS.

The support group, which meets on the last Wednesday of the month at the Licking County Library, is designed to give women a safe space to talk about postpartum depression or other perinatal mental illnesses, which occur during pregnancy or after giving birth.

"I want people to know that this is a thing women experience and it's OK to talk about it," she said.

Women can experience postpartum depression, which involves appetite and sleep problems, crying, sadness or anger, withdrawal and a lack of interest in their baby. Unlike the baby blues, which is normal and goes away on its own, these symptoms last longer than two weeks and affect women's ability to care for themselves and their children, according to Postpartumprogress.com.

"About 15 to 20 percent of moms have it, and those are the moms that say something," Estep said.

Women also can experience postpartum anxiety, which causes excessive worries and fears about their baby, or postpartum obsessive compulsive disorder, which is characterized by obsessions and compulsions.

A very small percentage of women can experience postpartum psychosis, which is a very dangerous disease that involved delusions or hallucinations that can sometimes cause women to harm themselves or their children.

These cases are very rare, but they are the cases of postpartum illness that everyone hears about, Estep said.

"That's what makes the news, and that's the face of postpartum depression," she said. "There are a lot of misconceptions."

When Estep finally started talking about the way she was feeling, a doctor incorrectly assumed she was dangerous. Instead of helping her come up with a treatment plan, the physician sent her to a psychiatric hospital for five days.

When Estep left the hospital, she was able to start counseling and medication, which helped her feel better. But her negative experience with the stigma of postpartum depression stayed with her.

In late 2013, she decided to start a support group.

"I felt like my next step was finding someone else who had postpartum depression and anxiety," she said. " For me, I needed to hear someone else say: 'I know exactly what you mean.' "

She initially started the group at Ohio State University-Newark and did a radio interview to try to reach other moms.

When Boeshart heard Estep on the radio, she was thrilled for the opportunity to talk to someone.

She began experiencing postpartum depression after the birth of her second child and was struggling to balance her two children with her job.

Estep encouraged her to go to a counselor, and Boeshart began the journey toward recovery.

Boeshart touched base with Estep months later and discovered she has stopped the support group because of low participation.

The two women decided they wanted to bring back MOMS at the main branch of the Licking County Library, 101 W. Main St., Newark.

They'll host the first meeting of the revamped support group from 6 to 8 p.m. March 25.

"I know there is a need because I need it," Estep said. "I didn't want to go to Columbus to find support."

Their main objective is to give mothers the opportunity to talk about what they are going through and encourage them that they can feel better.

"It is treatable, but it takes time," Estep said. "And the length of recovery depends on the length of time it takes to admit there's a problem and seek help."

Postpartum illnesses can happen to anyone, not just first-time mothers, Boeshart said. It doesn't mean that you are a bad person or a bad mother.

One of the most difficult things for Boeshart after her diagnosis was educating her parents and friends about postpartum depression.

Both women said they wish someone would have talked to them about the illness while they were pregnant. They both went through doctor appointments and prenatal classes, but postpartum illnesses were never mentioned.

"I remember being pregnant and saying: 'I'll have postpartum depression because I'll miss the feeling of my baby in my belly,' " Estep said. "I was so unaware. If I had known, I probably could have sought help sooner."

On June 20, MOMS will organize a Climb Out of the Darkness walk to raise awareness of postpartum depression and other illnesses.

As the group gets more active, Estep said, she hopes more women will participate and get the help they need.

"Support is so vital, just having someone to just ask you how you are doing," Estep said. "You need to feel like people care about you."

ajeffries@newarkadvocate.com

740-328-8544

Twitter: @amsjeffries

Need support?

Mothers Offering Mothers Support meets from 6 to 8 p.m. on the last Wednesday of every month at the main branch of the Licking County Library, 101 W. Main St., Newark. The next meeting will be March 25 in meeting room B.

For more information, email momsforlife43055@gmail.com or go to facebook.com/mothersofferingsupport.

For more information on postpartum depression and other perinatal mental illnesses, go to postpartumprogress.com.